Cool design thing...

One of my besties, Lisa, posted a link to Wordle - a cool word randomizer applet. I put the text of my sister's blog about Alexa in and selected all pink. Cute.

I'll miss you, Estelle...

Estelle Getty, the amazing Sophia Petrillo, died yesterday. She was the youngest of the Golden Girls and the first to go. I really was holding out hope for a reunion show entitled
"REALLY Golden Girls"... sigh.

I'll miss you, Estelle! You were such a sassy broad.

Missed Connection, continued...

Okay, so here is the follow-up tale to my Missed Connection adventure...

He replied:

hey colleen,
so is it a bad thing i posted my first missed connection? and i'm going to be in your blog?

weird. honestly, i've never done it before.

well, i'm dana. tattooed bloke indeed. (never, been refered to as a bloke since my friend chris returned to the UK). how are you doing? care to talk about nerds?

Ha! So, I replied.
Then, he replied.
Then, I replied.
Then, he replied.
Then, he replied again.

I haven't replied to those last two yet, mostly because I don't know how to respond to:

um, after reading this today, i'm glad i don't sound too dumb considering i was quite flavored during my response.

I was drunk-emailed! Haha, I am considering something like: "What is "flavored"? I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and don't understand your heathen ways."
Maybe too much?

Craigslist and Missed Connections

Thanks go to Natalie, who made this whole hilarious event possible.

So, on Craigslist, there is this section called "Missed Connections." Essentially, if someone sees someone they think is cute or whatever and just missed their opportunity, he/she would go to Craigslist and post, hoping that their object of affection might see it and make up for the "missed connection" (clever, eh?).

So. You readers know I recently got a book entitled "Nerds: Who They Are and Why We Need More of Them." I was on the Orange Line, got off at Sullivan Square. I noticed this guy, and noticed that he noticed me (remind you of the Fresh Prince of Bel Air? I may be the only one who gets that reference...). We got on the escalator at the same time (maybe orchestrated by him? I couldn't tell...). Well, I boarded the 101 bus. I noticed this guy again, and he was looking back at the bus. He looked back at the bus a couple of times and it appeared that he was writing something down or looking at an iPhone/cell/something. I thought to myself: "wouldn't that be hilarious if he was getting the bus number for a missed connection?"

Well.


Hahaha! I was meaning to check out the listings just for kicks, and kept forgetting. Then, Natalie (this is where she comes in) sends me the following on G-chat (and we have the following conversation):

Natalie: is this you? http://boston.craigslist.org/gbs/mis/756395239.html
me: OH MY FREAKING GOSH
YES
HAHAHAHAHA
I know who that is
!!!!
Natalie: is it really?
me: YES
i smiled at him
and laughed
Natalie: hil.ar.ious.
me: and i saw him look at my bus number
hahahahahahah
Natalie: i wondered if it was based on your blog about the books you got; and the orange line
me: YES
hahahahhaha
Natalie: YOU SHOULD RESPOND
me: I TOTALLY WILL
and you'll get the credit
hahaha
Natalie: NICE! Freak, I've always wanted one written about me. BUt I also look for my friends. :)
me: hahaha
that is HILARIOUS
i have to blog that
Natalie: DO IT

I emailed my nerdy friend. We'll see!

Raiding the Boston Public Library...

I work within walking distance of the Boston Public Library, which is one of my favorite places in Bostonia. As part of the "Great Save All My Money So That I Can Be Debt Free By The Time I Complete My Master's Degree Plan of 2008", I have been temporarily denying myself the sublime elation of owning new books and checking them out from the BPL.

My way of selecting a book (and just about anything else browsing/shopping related) is grabbing everything that initially catches my eye and then going through a weeding out process at the end (pissing off librarians and retail associates [and perhaps men?] throughout the Metro Boston area).

Today's trip was motivated by returning two books I had out: Kurt Vonnegut's Welcome to the Monkey House and Letters Home (a collection of Sylvia Plath's letters to her family from Smith and the early days of her marriage to Ted Hughes before her suicide). I wanted to check out two recently released books and I also wanted to browse other works by Margaret Atwood (from my Top 5 list of authors) for future reading delights. After my browsing process I ended up with the following:

The Party Faithful: How and Why Democrats Are Closing the God Gap
I had read a chunk of this that was featured as a teaser excerpt in a Christian Liberal magazine I read, and I guess that did its job of getting me to read the book. Too bad for Amy Sullivan, though, because I got it at a library and not a Borders.

Nerds: Who They Are and Why We Need More of Them
Obviously the title alone was enough to snag me, but I also read a review of this in Wired. Its more of a parenting book than anything else - essentially discussing ways of modifying being a nerd from something that kids abhor to the awesomeness that I (and David Anderegg) know it is. These top two are the books I was specifically after.

Cat's Eye
Margaret Atwood

Moral Disorder
Collection of short stories by Margaret Atwood

Dancing Girls
Collection of short stories by Margaret Atwood

Mortified: Love Is a Battlefield
This is another installment of this awesome series I discovered. People submit their journal entries from their adolescence and the most embarrassing and most hilarious and most familiar entries get collected (by David Nadelberg). Great! As the owner of multiple completely ridiculous diaries, I am definitely a fan. It also includes a small "Where Are They Now"-type section and their commentary as adults. Hilarious.

So, as I began to commence the weeding out, I decided I'd saunter over to the Information Desk to ask how many books someone is allowed to have out simultaneously. Turns out you can check out 75 items at a time! Yes! For some reason, I always figured you were WAY more limited. So, I happily skipped the elimination process and got all of them.
Simple pleasures, I guess, but I am super pumped.

Alexa's Funeral

Well. Alexa's funeral was really beautiful. It was extremely hard for everyone. You know, when I left for Texas (made possible by my amazing home teacher, Spencer Nam), I thought I was going to be the stalwart pillar of strength for my family. Then... well... I was in shambles. Seeing her little face everywhere. I think that every little girl I see is her for an instant. I touched her hand, and I started then to miss her so much. I know that I've already said this, but I can truly feel the shimmer of the world decrease without her presence in it. I am having a tough time, but I know that it is nothing compared to what Crys and Zack are feeling. I could never comprehend that, and, selfishly, I hope I never have to. They are amazing and I am very proud to have such strong people in my family.

I have posted the slideshow tribute played at Alexa's funeral below. Crys described the funeral in her last post on Alexa's site:

Yesterday was beautiful. Everything was perfect, as it should be for a princess. The church was filled with pink flowers in honor of our girl. We had a table set up with many of her favorite things that I think people enjoyed seeing and touching. So many people came out to celebrate her life with us, many of whom wore pink for her- even men. Thank you.

I couldn't believe how many people were there sitting in the chapel all to support us. What was most touching to Zack and I was the genuine love everyone felt for Alexa. We loved her so much and to see that so many people came not just to support us as her parents but truly to grieve for themselves over the loss of Alexa was deeply moving to us.

The music was perfect, the slide show Colleen stayed up all night to put together was heart wrenchingly wonderful, Kirsten, my father and John all did an amazing job telling of our little girl and how wonderful she was. I gave my talk about her and although it was difficult at times I had to do it. As I said at the beginning, no one could talk about my baby better than her mommy. Zack told me he thought it was perfect and I said everything he would have said so I felt good about that.

Her spirit was strongly with us yesterday as we honored her memory.

The hardest part for Zack and I was seeing her little friends cry. They all came up to us with tear stained cheeks and hugged us several times. I held onto them and tried to let them know how much they meant to our daughter. They brought her laughter and love and most of all a friendship she will never forget. Nor will we and we love those kids more than we can say. Being close to them makes me feel close to her.

The service was beautiful and afterwards we had a nice family lunch provided by the church. There were pink flowers on every table. It was nice to sit and talk and love on all my nephews and cousins.

From there we headed to Alexa's graveside. Her headstone has been up for almost a year so it was nice to have that for people to see. It has her name on it, a crown and then the quote I picked for her: 'If love could have kept you here, you would never have gone.' So true.

After a prayer, some friends help pass out 50 pink balloons. One for every month she was alive. Alexa loved getting balloons just so she could run outside and let them go. She was funny that way. On the count of three all the children and several more let go and they floated up together toward heaven. It was really neat. A friend was kind enough to take pictures and send them to me. I posted a few here. There were many others over the country who let go of balloons for Alexa too. As a friend of hers told me yesterday, she will get every one of them.

Thank you to everyone for your love and support and encouragement. Thank you for loving our daughter. Thank you for making her life one filled with incredible memories and fun times. I have gotten every gift and every flower and every donation. Forgive me for not sending thank you cards, but know that they are all appreciated.

As we strive to learn how to live in our new life we will be taking time off to be away by ourselves. I have told several we are going into hiding. We will be okay. Our love for each other is strong and our love for our son is immense. He is a living tribute to Alexa.

And with that I close this journal. It has been a long and wonderful 2 1/2 years. Thank you for being with us on this journey.

***

I will be keeping a family blog if you would like to follow us. We will be checking the signatures here as well so feel free to sign anytime. We love you all. Thank you.

www.meandmyzacks.blogspot.com

Alexa

I miss this baby girl so much already. It feels like I rarely saw her since my move across the country to Boston, but I could feel her spirit in the world, as crazy as that sounds. I suppose her spirit is still with us, as far as that goes, but not nearly as palpable. I am currently working on the video that will be playing at her funeral, and just editing the music for it has me in tears. I'm not sure how adding the photos and videos tomorrow is going to go, but I know it does not compare to the agony her parents, my sister and her husband, must be feeling. I know all the sayings about "she is in a better place" and "she doesn't have to suffer anymore"... but you know... those don't really mean much when you see her face and know that you won't see her for years and years. If you believe that you will at all, which, gratefully, I do.

Here is a re-post from Alexa's website, featuring funeral information:

We spent a nice quiet night sleeping, waking intermittently to expect Alexa to be standing there by our bedside wanting us to lift her up and put her between us on 'her pillow'.

She is all around us keeping us peaceful. Her little face shines at us wherever we go in the pictures we have up in our home. We want desperately to touch her and feel her and talk to her one last time to know she is okay. She continues to be in our hearts.

Several have asked for an address to send things to. You can send it here and the service information is below. Thank you. 11409 Lauren Way, Keller, TX 76248

The service is on Saturday:

Bear Creek Bible Church
1555 N. Tarrant Parkway
Keller, TX 76248

9-11 visitation in the chapel, Alexa's coffin will be open
11-12 service with closed coffin
at conclusion of service, we will be at the doors for good-byes
12-2 family lunch
2:00 graveside service at Grapevine Cemetery on North Dooley Street in Grapevine off of Business 114/Northwest Highway

My niece, Alexa, just died.

I can't concentrate.

If I wasn't LDS, I would be Baha'i.

"Baha'ullah wrote, 'Be anxiously concerned with the needs of the age ye live in, and center your deliberations on its exigencies and requirements.' Fundamental to Baha'i belief is the conviction that every person, every people, every nation has a part to play in building a peaceful and prosperous global society."

My niece is doing not-so-hot. I am not a big talker when things are happening in my life, but thank you all for your concern and prayers.